niche perfume gift guide
starterpacks, mindmaps and diabolical fragrantica reviews
hello!
in case you are lost in the overwhelming maze of holiday gifting, I am here to state that you officially have nothing to worry about anymore. I mapped all the important perfumes my brain knows by heart, and will help you find The One niche perfume. For yourself, for your crush, or for your nemesis.
we’ll start with starter packs and end with a perfume map that doesn’t divide by gender but by extra/introversion. I swear its a better system.
niche perfumes for niche archetypes
I’m sure you know 1 or some of these people, these are the perfumes they match with!
perfumes are linked + I added fragantica reviews for more clarity (and joy).
notorious performative male:
Fugazzi - Parfum 1 Fragantica review: “this is the only fragrance that actually screams ‘i am niche!’ Smells worth the money.”
Essential Parfums - Bois Imperial “literally should be banned.”
Le Labo - Santal 33 “whether or not this (…) smells like heaven or like dill pickles or like a migraine incarnate is down to personal biology/chemistry.”
“effortless” friend of a friend:
Maison Crivelli - Iris Malikhân “the rich quality make it stand out but at the same time its subdued enough to be versatile, there is no occasion in my mind that you couldn’t wear this to.”
ODE ONA - Moonkissed Rhapsody “its like sitting on a well worn blanket under the stars on a cool summers night, in a field of lavender and dried grass.”
Santa Maria Novella - Melograno “Soap. Cough drops. Fabulosity. Melograno.” -
“I wore this to the Rodeo the other night. It was perfect.”
liberal arts nepo baby - male
lowkey doesn’t believe in female intellect but did the mental gymnastics to think that he does:
Frederic Malle - Uncut Gem “Dudes in the reviews talking about this being a “proletariat” fragrance good grief we have lost the plot with society. $470 fragrance at the time of writing btw. Where’s the awareness”
Dries Van Noten - Santal Greenery “I really enjoy this because the sandalwood doesn’t smell like a hamster cage, the fig is not-quite-ripe and so it retains some brightness, and the violet leaf and grapefruit give it some zing.”
Stora Skuggan - Moonmilk “it’s inward-facing. This is the scent of someone who knows their own mind, but also doesn’t always feel the urge to share it. It’s feline, not canine. A soft-footed loner. Slightly aloof but also full of lively contradictions.”
Maison Martin Margiela - Bubble Bath “If I remember correctly, this smells like a nostalgic Dove soap.”
earthy “minimalist” spiritual professional “creator” with passport privilege who
might or might not find herself somewhere in the wellness to fascism pipeline
but is definitely at risk:
Demeter - Kitten Fur “it gives that feeling and cuddling a cat with its fur pressed against your face. It somehow smells so soft and fluffy, warm, and powdery. It’s a very pleasant and calming fragrance”
Poese - Library Ghost “As a librarian / library science student, this is one of the best book / library fragrances I’ve ever smelled.”
Lore - Somewhere but Nowhere “it’s got a clean feel, it’s multidimensional. It opens up robust, woody, and warm. It keeps some of that warmth but it’s like a beautiful piece of wood with Kintsugi gold fill throughout. As it moves and turns, the warmth and depth of the wood grounds, while the gold veins run along it, glimmering in the light.”
Lush - 4:20 “It’s a damp earthy, smoky, mossy patchouli scent that lasts forever. It’s like tripping over a tree root in the middle of a forest and ending face down in the moss and dirt.”
diabolical 4chan edgelord incel boy turned contrarian dj / designer pretending to be woke in order to get manic pixie dream girls to be his emotional support pets:
Etat Libre d’Orange - Secretions Magnifiques “it does evoke a gagging reflex, from a distance its a weird white floral, and up close it instantaneously becomes ammonia/bleach chlorinated sock or something, really, really unpleasant, but not necessarily organic or rancid like people imply.”
“This is obviously a famously off-putting perfume. When I first applied it, the adrenaline came on so strongly my heart was beating out of my chest and I felt like I was panicking, I raced to wash it off, only to find that it would linger for several days.”
American/Canadian expat living in Europe:
D.S & Durga - Concrete Lightning “An absolute impeccable depiction of the candle. (…) For years I would put the candle wax on my wrist to bring Concrete After Lighting to life on my skin, now I don’t have to take such unusual measures.”
Arpa - Fosforo “I get pickled lemon at the top. A good herbal clary sage to the lemon. The myrrh is transformed in this fragrance. Not its usual warmth, but a shining note that mingles with the lemon. At the base it smells of wormwood, hiba, and other bitter roots.”
Tsu Lange Yor - Sage’s Rose “For me, this is an incredibly cool girl at a natural wine bar who mixed her roll on incense oils from the hippy shop with a last minute spritz of her mums vintage Shalimar perfume. She is unbothered, but leaves a scent trail that makes others double take.”
Perfume gift map: extrovert vs introvert edition
I do apologise for the tiny text, the quality should be just good enough to zoom in - or you can just download the pdf below, probably better!
To check if your end result actually resonates with you, here’s all the links to the perfumes + my notes
Killian - Princess - powdery marshmellow
D’annam - In the garden - lush tropical garden after rain
Tom Ford - Soleil Blanc - smells like sunscreen
Comme des Garcons - BLACK - heavy church incense
Montale Paris - Arabians Tonka - everyone will smell you from far away, heavy oud, amber musk and very sweet but great for men as well
Dries Van Noten - Neon Garden - my favourite dries perfume, smells synthetic in the best way
Toskovat - Born Screaming - cherry, plastic, latex, pearls, patchouli, flowers
Vaquera - Classique Perdu - comme des garcons collab: 90s perfume advertisements, metallic shimmer of summer fountains.
Perfume de Marlys - Valaya - skin scent that lasts a very long time, especially on clothes. somehow smells like pepper, avoid if you don’t like that
Arpa Studios - Recedere - brilliant brand of nature smelling perfume oils by one of the noses of Aesop
NasoMatto - Narcotic V(enus) - perfumer from amsterdam: white florals, sweet but well balanced masterpiece
D’annam - White Rice - photorealistic rice perfume
Intimissimi - No1 - great to layer, pure powder
Clean - Rain - ozonic + aquatic
D’annam - Pomelo Oolong - fresh ,sharp, realistic tea scent
Le labo - another 13 - addictive, glossy magazine paper, synthetic skin scent. subtle but powerful
Glossier - you - easy unisex skin scent, pencil shave, warm, light sweetness
Le labo - Patchouli 24 - sitting next to an open fire listening to someone playing guitar while hugging your lover
Le labo - Gaiac 10 - has been my favourite for years. subtle, white wood, futuristic, nothing like it.
Ex Nihilo - generation(s) I don’t smell any of the accords and notes on fragantica. to me this is a simple lactonic brilliant scent.
Ode Ona - Moon kissed rhapsody futuristic formulation like Gaiac 10 but very different. nature soaked in synthetics. smells like a herb garden in space in the best way.
Juliette has a gun - Not a perfume I used to layer this with everything. It’s just ambroxan in a bottle.
this was so much work lol, since every perfume in here is hand (&nose) - sought out.
hope you enjoyed and had a little laugh. please share or interact with this post if you‘ve enjoyed it. your support means so much! see you soon! <3
xoxo,
